One Foot In Front of the Other

The thought of speaking about my drinking problem or any other problems I have isn't what I fear,it was having to face the problem at all. I have spoken in front of numberous of persons before revealing my scared soul, but this was different. Now I was actually asking for someone's help. Just thinking about being able to put one foot in front of the other was terrifying. Could I really take this on and see the challenge for what it was, for myself, especially for the rest of my life? Only time would tell. With hope and prayer I mustered up enough strength so that I could face this demon of mine head on. For the first time in so many years I was actually stepping through a door into the dark abyss. Like my heart disease that I had faced many years before there was much unknown to me in this new quest. My fear and the feeling of being unsure surrounded my every fiber like a new enemy. With one clear thought in mind I knew that no matter what lay ahead I could do whatever it took to accomplish my goal of becoming sober and staying that way for the rest of my life. My challenges of having had heart disease for fourteen years had taught me one important fact. I could accomplish anything that I set my mind to including, becoming sober. This was my last major hurdle in a long list of many failures in my life. Throw in a little bit of uncertainty and I will buckle down and achieve anything. Even that which seems impossible. My will to survive is only surmounted by my will to never fall prey to the unknown. For all that I have failed at and all that I have achieved one element remains in my soul, it is the knowledge that I am the captain of my own ship, in all things I trust what I have endured and learned. I am a survivor and a conqueor of the unexpected. Not even death's grip could hold me and thus so has given me a renewed zeal to become victorious over all things that would hold be back. Like all things that push against me, I have waged war against the opression of heart disease, alcoholism and diabetes. Everday that I continue to be the victor I collected that winning chip called life. With one foot in front of the other I step into each day ready for battle, expecting a victory. There is always room for continuing self improvement day by day being reminded that my failures are also a part of who I am. But always I remain the captain of my ship, seeking all things in life that encourage peace, kindness and a true heart that knows, one step at at time. One foot in front of the other, into my future path,I sail.